Every New Year I make resolutions to eat better, exercise more and work less, yet I never seem to be able to carry through on such self-made promises. Why do I consistently have such a difficult time making these basic lifestyle changes, when they appear to be so reasonable and positive? It just doesn't make sense.
Be assured you are not uniquely challenged in this regard in that most every human being struggles to bring such changes to pass. The most common source of this difficulty is inner resistance. Such internal opposition arises from aspects of consciousness the individual is generally unaware of or simply chooses to ignore.
These aspects often have the power to override or dominate what one usually identifies as "self". Consequently, when people make decisions (from this narrow concept of self) and the anticipated result does not occur they end up feeling very confused, frustrated and disappointed. As you yourself lamented, "it just doesn't make sense". But of course it makes perfect sense once you comprehend the bigger picture.
Although most humans see themselves as the omnipotent ruler of their own world (or consciousness), the part that strongly identifies with this role often has very little awareness of other (seemingly less visible or obvious) aspects of being. Moreover, such self-appointed rulership is rarely endorsed or recognized by these other elements. To complicate matters, such rouge aspects are often operating under the same delusion that they are (or at least should be) the supreme ruler of your domain. Amidst all of this complexity, there are also countless other factions or special interest groups constantly vying for attention and control. Such is the confusing mess and chaotic nature of unenlightened human consciousness. If such thinking were not so pervasive and familiar, it would be labeled insane.
You may be asking yourself, how does anything of value ever get accomplished with such a chaotic, splintered configuration running the show? Well, from a higher perspective, very little of lasting value ever does get done (either individually or collectively) compared to what we were divinely-designed to manifest.
Those few among us who seem better able to direct their lives are either operating more in accord with various aspects of their being or they have developed a very dominant part (a particularly strong inner faction) that consistently wields control over much weaker elements. Still, such inner "harmony" does not guarantee a constructive outcome in that unification can just as easily be focused around negative creations as positive ones. In fact, as long as the personality is in control, most every creation that arises will be ultimately negative (due to the fear-based nature of the ego). The machine-like efficiency of Nazi Germany or the single-minded focus of a serial killer being two extreme cases in point!
Fortunately, the human race is not eternally sentenced to lives of either splintered chaos or organized destruction. Long ago, the capacity for enlightened leadership was placed within the heart of each and every being. Such divine leadership has the capacity to harmoniously and joyfully unite all of the warring, chaotic factions within the insanity that presently makes up human-based consciousness. Not only can it govern perfectly (due to being centered in Love), it can do it for all of eternity.
The more each person discovers (and ultimately surrenders) to this profound source of Loving rulership within, the more the planet as a whole will also change for the better. At a certain point, divine perfection and harmony will reign throughout the globe just as effortlessly and commonly as chaos and destruction currently do. Then the human race will have something truly glorious to celebrate; not just the coming of a New Year but the unfoldment of an entirely New Age filled with unbridled Peace, Prosperity and Joy!
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